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To City Council,

I'm still waiting for the Valley Line to be cancelled.

As we all know, this train brings no benefit whatsoever to our city. On the other hand it certainly does bring a large amount of destruction and disruption to this part of the city. The train also causes constant traffic problems, is disruptive in other ways and exposes the entire area to unnecessary danger. Plus, it's really ugly too.

And we also all know that we can move more people a lot faster by using buses. And buses cost a fraction of what trains cost and we don't need to wreck the place to use buses either. They work just fine on the existing roads. So compared to buses, trains clearly suck bad and installing them is the worst possble thing this city could be doing at this point in history.

So I really don't care about the consequences to certain city officials when you cancel this project. In my opinion, incompetent people ought to be sacked and the corrupt deserve jail time. In the case of these LRT projects, the city administration seems overrun with both types so I think a proper house cleaning is in order here.

And I most definitely don't care about the train vendors. That train company the city appears to be in collusion with has no business being in my neighborhood. We had a nice neighborhood here and the traffic, the businesses, the pedestrians and the parks users all worked rather well together until these people came along and started wrecking the place.

And as for those so called "developers"? I really don't care at all about them either. They can take their cheap towers and shove them you know where. I like houses, trees, parks and nice neighborhoods. As do all my neighbors and all the other people I know personally.

So if anyone asks why we need to cancel this monstrosity, here are just a few reasons:

Trains don't reduce congestion, they increase it
Trains don't help help business, they stifle it
Trains don't reduce commute times, they lengthen them
Trains are not pretty, they are downright ugly
Trains don't reduce pollution, they increase it
Trains are not safe, they are very dangerous
Trains don't prevent sprawl, they encourage it
Trains don't increase density, they waste valuable surface area

And trains are not popular in any way among the public. In fact they are widely hated and for good reason. Seems to me that the only people who like these trains are train vendors and a number of city employees who appear to be in collusion with them.

And hey, I didn't even mention the massive and excessive costs these trains come with. Well, until now that is.

But the money is why we're doing it right? I mean, how else can we transfer billions in cash and public land to that train company and and bunch of other cronies without triggering automatic jail sentances?

I can't figure out a better way either so I do understand why this project came to be. Still, actually building the stupid train is pretty lame considering that at any point we can just cancel it. Then we simply use the courts and some dubious interpretations of contract law to cause the court to award billions to the train company.

That way the tax money is properly laundered and transfered to the crooked like it was supposed to be and at the same time nobody loses any roads or parks. Doesn't really work for me though. I'd rather we just enforced the law instead of evading it. And I generally prefer it when we put people who do stuff like this behind bars actually.

But if nobody in authority has the will to do that, then from my point of view, plan B, corrupt as it may be, still beats living next the worst railway in the world.

Speaking of which, currently the Metro line is worst railway in the world. But the Valley Line will soon take the title and the Metro line will be relegated to 2nd worst. So why even have the thing then? No point in owning both of the worst railways in the world. Talk about redundant. So besides cancelling the Valley Line, we might as well get rid of the Metro line at the same time. Life here was much better here back when Calgary had the worst railway in the world you know.

And in closing, yes indeed, some other places on this planet may well need trains. So what. Too bad for them.

Nobody is forcing them to live on a rocky spit of land surrounded on three sides by ocean. Or on an island in the middle of a massive river. If people make lifestyle choices like that then decide they need trains to get in and out of their homes, it's their problem, not mine.

Here, we have full access in all directions to anywhere in the area. We use roads to accomplish this great feat. It's a big reason why this area is so wealthy. And it's the main reason why we can use cars and buses everywhere and is also why we don't need any trains here, not now and not ever.

Normally, something like this is called "an advantage".

And in reality, this existing road net we already have works really, really well. So it's a massive advantage then. Or at least it was until some people came along and started installing these stupid trains everywhere for the express purpose of blocking traffic to cover up institionalized graft.

Warmest Regards,
A. Votre

If you oppose the train you can complain to the mayor or your councillor here: City of Edmonton Website
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